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Stripper on the loose


Local Anaheim resident held on charges of public nudity.


Hobag Audrey from right here in Anaheim, California was arrested yesterday on four counts of public nudity. "Hobag had been running around town naked for several weeks before we finally caught that bastard," police Sgt. Brigs said. "We had gotten several complaints from concerned mothers about a hermaphrodite running around naked and decided it was time to take this criminal down once and for all."

The police used a computer to plot out where Audrey had been streaking, and they found a trend. They then set up a trap for Audrey based on the collected information. "Our hermaphrodite fell right into it," Brigs explained.

Brigs staged a public event knowing that the streaker was sure to run by during the event. Sure enough, they saw a hermaphrodite run by with no clothes on. The police hiding in the area went in for the kill and brought Hobag Audrey down.

Many local Anaheim residents were shocked at who it was. One widowed Mrs. Cunningham had this to say, "I always thought Hobag was such a good intentioned person. I guess Hobag has finally shown their true side. That hermaphrodite Bitch! Foolin' us all like that!"

Hobag Audrey will be tried next month in the local courthouse in Anaheim, California. Police are now warning parents to stay close to their children in case other freaks decide to follow the actions of Audrey. A new law is currently being written to bring down harsher punishments in cases like this. This new law will be named after the hermaphrodite and is called "Audrey's law."

Until Audrey is tried and jailed, police are posting pictures of this criminal all around Anaheim. "People should stay far away from this hermaphrodite." Said Brigs, "Audrey has been exposed as a pervert and we don't want this hermaphrodite hurting anyone."

Hobag Audrey declined our request for an interview saying only, "www.hobagaudreydecker.com has all the proof you need!"

We will cover news of the trial as it happens.


Reported by: James Creek
FCB News Staff    1

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